A note to self.

Listen to me: It is okay to be a mess. 

It’s okay to have thick thighs and lots of questions and crumbs in your bra. It is completely alright to fall too hard, to feel too much and to overthink everything. 

You can be too scared to move out of the place that you hate, you can be too stubborn to ask for the help you need and you can be too shy to make a move, hang on a little longer or hear those words. 

Do not tell yourself to be to be quiet. Do not tell yourself that you’re too wild, too forgetful, too stupid or not good enough. You need not sit and wait and do as they please. 

Be sharp and shy, and a lazy bum in your bed every weekend. Be thoughtful, and sentimental but never regretful. Be the kind of person that looks herself in the mirror to see the good, not the bad. 

May that cackle remind you the sun will come out tomorrow and may that kindness remind you that even when they don’t deserve it, you will be bigger, better, not once second guessing that choice. May that pocket-full of sarcasm guide you through the worst of days and brighten the best of days.

You are a complex creature with a pinch of this and that, pastels and petals. There will always be more layers than meets the eye, for you are not one thing, but a whole fucking gallery of complexities, conundrums, insanity and happy.

It’s completely abnormal to be abstract and absurd, barely there and all-in at the exact same time. And you, you do it well. It’s what you are. So alive it makes your eyes water, your lip twitch and your heart beat.

So hear me when I say this, because I want you to really listen to me. It’s okay to be a mess. Be exactly what you need to be, and want to be. It will always be good enough.

4 thoughts on “A note to self.

  1. One thing that I have come to accept is welcoming confrontation with myself. And even becoming a good listener to my inner self has been helpful. It was scary, sadly, but I’m glad I got over ignoring what I needed to hear. Good post!

    Like

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