Feeling a little lost today.

~ V

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about time. The time we give, the time we take, the time we steal, the time we make, how much time we get, how much time we don’t… it’s crazy to me how two people can go through the same six months together and come out as completely separate people.

If you’d asked me a year ago if I thought I’d be this person today, I would have said ‘hell to the no’. Hell, if you’d asked me six months ago if I’d be here today, I’d have laughed you right out of my house. That’s the thing about time though… though we all expect it, you never really see it coming.

I’ve changed a lot… so much so that it scares me sometimes. So, I try to not think about it. My priorities have changed. My desires have changed. My outlook on life as a whole… has changed. Does anything ever stay the same?

As I navigate this new version of me, hoping to find happiness in a world that doesn’t seem to have a ton of it these days, I’m wondering if I even know what happiness is anymore. Would I know happiness if it were staring me in the face? I have so many questions and with next to no answers.

Published by V

Overly sentimental, heel-loathing introvert, problem solver and lover of the night.

46 thoughts on “Feeling a little lost today.”

  1. Wow, what a powerful topic. I stay in the “now” and try not to worry about what was or what will be. As for happiness, what is happiness? This would be different for everyone, but for me, overall, I would say I am happy. Life isn’t perfect, but it isn’t bad either., all the best.

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    1. Thank you! I need to take a page out of your book and try to not worry about what was or what will be. I appreciate your insights.

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  2. For me, I TRY to live in the present and TRY not to think about the past and the future. But, as a 60 year old, whenever I feel something out of the ordinary (I mean health wise) that’s what gets me a little bit off balanced. That’s when my brain brings me to all these negative thought. Oh well, live goes on!

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    1. Life does go on. I completely understand you about the health worries though. As much as I try to not think about it, it’s hard. Life does go on, and this too shall pass… am I right?

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  3. The way I look at it we cannot take our time for granted because it is not a guarantee. Enjoy the time you have, every moment you can with your loved ones. It is normal to change over time and for you to grow and change as a person, I honestly believe that is normal and healthy. What makes you happy can also change and that is okay. I say take it a day at a time, enjoy this life, it truly is a gift to live and love (in my humble sappy opinion).
    Trust yourself V and trust you know what makes you happy. And remember change can be good. 🙂

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      1. I’m happy my words could help bring a smile to your face.
        I like to think it’s a mix of both 😄

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  4. It’s said happiness is found in the contentment of what you have. I think where this pursuit of happiness becomes foiled is when it’s searched for outside of ourselves.

    I really loved this subject and I can relate to your thoughts. Not only does time change you, it also reveals many things that consequently affect how we change and the direction our lives take. But it’s good that you’re accepting those changes with an attitude to keep moving forward. It’s the only thing we can do and I do hope you can find the answers to those questions.

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  5. Happiness is a choice and change is a pain. I have always adhered to these two beliefs. You define what makes you happy and nobody should take it against you whatever it is. Anything in our lives that are bound to change or is at the moment, changing, will bring pain, no matter if it is positive or negative. We just have to ponder what to do and embrace with hope.

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  8. The only thing that stays the same in life is change. I know, I know. I hate cliches too. :p
    For me, instead of searching for the key to happiness (because I usually think of that as such an extreme emotion), I am for contentment. And I saw someone else mention living in the present. Insert more cliches:
    1) yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not promised, today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.
    2) If you’ve got one foot in the past and one foot in the future, you’re sh!tting on the present. (This is my preferred saying 🤣🤣🤣)
    It takes time and patient to teach yourself how to live this way (and I STILL have difficulties with it), but, for me, it has made my life a bit more peaceful. 🥰🥰🥰

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    2. Haha this made me chuckle. I definitely have been shitting on the present lately. Think I need to start changing that outlook. Thank you for making me smile. This was a really kind comment and I appreciate it.

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  9. I must admit… I felt like this today and the thought of “What’s the use?” crossed my mind, and then I remembered my yesterday wasn’t as bleak as my today. I have the chance to impact my tomorrow, today.😄

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  10. All of us change Vee and most of us grow and evolve through the change.
    Just don’t let anyone or anything take your happiness away.
    The world is as it always was. Life is ….
    Once you start to work next week everything will change.
    Cheer up. Now, this moment is all you have 😊🤗

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      1. I feel like sometimes everyone else has something insightful to say and then there’s me, just feeling depressed and reminiscing on my life. People tell me what I write is insightful, but I don’t see it sometimes. At least people like what I write and I feel better after and enjoy writing it. I guess that’s just my life…

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  13. I think change is a good thing, but it is also very scary. It takes time to adjust to the unexpected and find sunshine when you feel your life has been turned upside-down and you want to go back to where it was before: before IT all.
    I cannot give you answers but I will hope you find yourself.

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  14. Day by day, life changes. Day by day, we change too. We have to embrace it or fall under its wheels. You’re doing brilliantly at keeping on top of it. And happiness? It will suddenly be there. You will know…

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    1. I definitely need to be better embracing it. That’s for certain. Thanks for your kindness. You’re far too nice to me.

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  15. I feel the same way. Isaw you read my blog about staying on your parents insurance. I’ve changed so much in the last two years I wonder if people will recognize me when I return back to the states. I’m trying to figure out what happiness means to me so I can figure out where to take my career. I look forward to reading more on your blog. Im sorry someone decided to write you hate speech, but you know they say if your not pissing someone off your not doing it right lol. Or they say something like that lol.

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  18. Some things change, but foundations are more difficult to reform. I am different but I still carry plenty of old habits and life experiences with me. Consistency can exist within a person, just depends on who. As for happiness. I am learning that it is less about pleasure and more about fulfilling myself. Living my best life now, being confident and happy now instead of waiting for the perfect body or right person or job. Just being content now with all that you have and making goals and striving to be all you can.

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  20. This makes sense. I’ve felt a lot recently that politics and discrimination have taken a personal toll on me, as if I’m somehow responsible for the wrongdoings of others

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    1. Oh, I’ve been through that too. I try to remind myself that, though I might not be able to change the big things, the things I do in small means – changing one person’s mind or helping one person who needs it, will make the difference for that person to pass it on and so on and so forth. It’s a nice feeling to hold onto amidst these uncertain times.

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