Grow through what you go through.

Growing up, there wasn’t a ton of money to go around my house. With a boatload of kids, living in one of the most expensive cities in Canada, my parents had every penny counted towards something two days prior to pay day arriving.

There were times when things got really bad. And yes, I know I am not the only one on earth who can say this. I was not alone in what I went through. And a lot of what I went through, kids are going through right now.

On more than one occasion, my brother’s and I went out on our bikes after dark to collect bottles from around the neighbourhood so that my mom could return them to the grocery store in hopes of getting $10 for gas money. That $10 would quite literally be the difference between my dad being able to drive to work and my dad hitchhiking to work. And since my parents always did everything within their power to make sure their children were looked after, as kids, we did everything in our power to make sure our parents were looked after.

I’ve learned a lot of lessons from my past. While I am a firm believer that our pasts don’t define us, I also believe that our past does teach us a lot if we’re willing to learn from it.

Me, I know A LOT about how to stretch a dollar. I’m exceptionally good with my money. And, though it does worry me at times (as I’m sure it does with everyone on earth unless you’re Bill Gates), I recognize that my upbringing taught me a lot about how to stay calm in times of financial struggle or monetary crisis.

Everyone on this earth has been through something difficult in their life. EVERYONE. What I’ve noticed though is some people seem doomed to make the same mistakes over and over. They’re not willing to learn from what they’ve been through.

I think that one of the best things you can do for your development and growth as a human is to learn from the circumstances that have made you. Grow through what you go through; learn from what you’ve been through. If you truly want to better yourself, to let your past make you better and your present make you stronger, then learn your lessons. Take the shittiest things that have ever happened to you and ask yourself how you can make sure that never happens again. Remember the hard times and ask yourself what you learned from them. I guarantee you, even if it’s not top of mind, you learned something from these times.

If you’ve been through hard times, if you’re going through hard times, ask yourself what you can take from the difficult and the struggle. Ask yourself how it’s going to make you better. Grow through what you go through. It sounds cliche but you’re braver than you think, stronger than you know and smarter than you believe.

44 thoughts on “Grow through what you go through.

  1. Agree!! I learned to save and search of deals and really stretch the dollar… even my mom couldn’t believe what I can do… it’s tough especially when I make less as a mom of two as having two maternity leaves caused my choice of career to suffer too… but the children are worth it….

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Great point. I think that it’s one that we can’t touch in often or hard enough – especially since it seems like learning the lesson is slightly beyond our actual grasp. Especially within the gay subculture I find myself on the fringe of.
    Maybe the best we can hope for is to realize that once we’ve gone through something and think we’ve learned from it, is to remain open to the reality that there’s sure to be another lesson coming down the pike.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I think you’re absolutely correct. There’s always something coming down the pike. The least you can do for yourself is learn from what’s happening to be able to face what’s coming!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I know about stretching dollars from my family. When we relocated from the city of New York to the mountains, there was little money before my father got a good job with the state which paid sufficently. He drove workers around and to work kind of like an early Uber. Most of my classmates moved for better opportunities.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I’m frugal AF and I have no shame admitting that. Nothing wrong with being clever with your dollars and learning how to make them last longer. My family spent and spent and spent, and stuff didn’t make them any happier.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. To add to this, I became frugal while in university when I realized that life costs money. I’ve had 7 jobs in my lifetime because I wanted money. And I would spend that money only to learn that I wasn’t any happier like my parents were. Being frugal gives me a sense of control in this chaotic world that we live in.


      1. Frugality also gives you a freedom to do what you please with what you have, rather than feeling doomed to be in tons and tons of credit card debt because you spent money you didn’t have!


  5. I watched my parents struggle raising 5. They both worked out to give us food and a roof over our heads.
    It took me years to learn how to manage my money.
    Again, ‘too soon old, too late smart’.
    V your posts always offer something insightful about the human condition!

    Liked by 3 people

  6. I see this with my husband’s son. Yes, he bought a boat, a big home, and has several children and lots of stuff. They are not happier than those without. I hope they learn what freedom is: being able to go where you want when you want and affording dreams. Jobs come and go but invest in your family and self and friends.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. That’s what I feel like. Everyone’s had struggles. Whether it’s violence or poverty or something much worse, if you’ve survived it you get stronger from it. ❤


  7. Hi V,
    First up thanks for liking my Blog.
    Secondly I enjoyed your open, honest, no BS blog.
    As a Millennial (bordering on Dinosaur age) I’ve “been there done that”. A little story from my webpage Inspirational link –!9333&ithint=file%2cdocx&authkey=!AFaGrvJPXfPaW18 might help keeps things in perspective.

    Good luck with your job hunting – don’t get mad get even.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I am the last of six with my Mom, Dad, & 4 siblings & my wife passed on to the next world up or down only God knows. I was never rich but I was happy with Chris she as my love soulmate & best friend. You know the saying when life deals you lemons make lemonade. Well in my life I got dealt plenty of lemons, but I lived learned worked hard, experienced life from a rumbling mans view. Some gotta win some gotta lose I won, I lost but I always made it through. and now the struggle I’m going through I may not make through.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Considering what you’ve made it through already, I’m sure that you can make it through. You seem like a tough soul, and a strong soul. Keep on keepin on ❤


  9. And Vee now you are GROWING through the phase of : GOING through your unemployment
    Whole of life is a school for learning. The big difference is: In life tests come first and learning later.
    Nothing lasts ….
    love and blessings

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Well, I’m hoping that if/when I do find happiness, it’ll last. Fingers crossed I do find it eventually. But, if I don’t, at least I know how to keep going. And there are people like you out there to keep me motivated.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. If good times didn’t last bad too won’t. So good times will come V.
        Nothings lasts. Nothing whatsoever
        But happiness doesn’t come. It has to be created.
        You need to do different things to get different results.
        My love and prayers are with you!
        And you keep praying for my book 😊🤗


  10. I absolutely love this post, hit me right in the gut! Very inspiring and truthful. I know I would not be who I am today without all the hardship I went through as a kid and adult. Did I say I love this post? Very cool read thank you so much!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Wow! This is a fantastic post, V. This is so true. We all have something to learn in life, usually many things. “What I’ve noticed though is some people seem doomed to make the same mistakes over and over. They’re not willing to learn from what they’ve been through.” I couldn’t agree more and you honestly have inspired me today, thank you. ❤

    Liked by 2 people

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