The worst things about unemployment part two

Photo from GFMAG.COM

Anyone who’s been unemployed for any length of time knows what it’s like to feel as though you don’t have a voice, a value or a place in this world. They understand what it’s like working hard to find work and ‘playing the game’ of the potential employer, to no avail, just waiting for your day in the sun.

Unemployment sucks and here are a few reasons why:

Being told you’re living easy. This one annoys the crap out of me. People think that if you’re not going to work each day, you’re not contributing, you bring no value to this world or their lives so all you’re doing is sitting on the couch watching Netflix. And since all you’re doing is sitting on the couch watching Netflix all day, you must not have any real problems and thus your life is inherently more easy than those with jobs. It’s a shitty assumption people make.

When people ask you what you do for a living. Do you tell the truth and deal with the awkward conversation that will follow? Do you lie and pretend that you do something you do not as a means to save face? Either way, it’s going to be awkward.

Being unemployed plays a contributing factor in many health concerns. Unemployment can lead to depression, low self-esteem, anxiety, and other mental-health issues that affect every aspect of your life… and there’s really nothing you can do about it, especially if you truly want a job and it doesn’t seem to be happening, no matter how hard you try. It can cause serious tension, stress and strain on the body.

Being an adult is so much more enjoyable when you have money. It’s true. And when you’re not making bank, or you’re struggling to make bank through side hustle after side hustle after side hustle, sometimes it just feels like it’s all you can do to keep the side hustle. You’re not enjoying life, you’re just trying to stay afloat and stop the feeling of drowning.

Rejection emails. I’m talking about the finely-tuned art of an automated response that somehow manages to very succinctly, professionally, and somehow brutally, crush your hopes and dreams with the kind of disengaged effort that is, by true dictionary standards, effortless. You’re reminded of just how little they care about you (and all job hunters) and just how far removed we’ve come from basic human interaction… because it’s all automated, no-response email addresses these days.

No response from a company whatsoever. I’ve noticed a distinct trend on Indeed and LinkedIn in which, if the company doesn’t find a resume they like, they’ll simply delete the job posting and repost it to present day so that it appears at the top of the list of most recent listings. You don’t get a response as to why you’re not being considered, you don’t get to know why you’re not good enough and you don’t get an email to ask them WTF! I’ve seen postings appear 5 or 6 times over the past few months.

You become so used to rejection that you begin to expect it in other areas of your life as well. This plays a lot to do with the low self-esteem mentioned above. Picture this – you meet a man or a woman in the bar and you really hit it off. After swapping phone numbers you head home for the evening and then you’re hit with it… the doubt you have about yourself. The fear of rejection and the bracing of yourself for when you don’t hear from said person ever again. It’s a serious mind-fuck that allows you to start to believe you’re not worthy of people, places or things, let alone the job that started the whole avalanche.

Trying to talk about it with people is a struggle. When you’re stressed it helps immensely to talk about it with someone. When you’re unemployed, you’re heavily stressed out. Trying to talk about this with anyone isn’t really an option though because they either don’t understand because they’ve never been through it, or they just don’t give a damn because, if it’s not their problem, they don’t want to hear about it.

You feel guilty about actually treating yourself. There’s a notion carried in society that if you’re unemployed you should not be enjoying yourself and you should not do something for yourself or have fun of any sort. So, if you do take the chance to do something for yourself to try and boost your self-esteem or make yourself happy, even if just for a few hours, you inevitably end up feeling guilty for doing such action because… you’re unemployed, and thus should not be spending your money on what is deemed frivolous things.

Receiving unsolicited advice. Because when you’re unemployed everyone has an opinion about what you should do and everyone wants to share their opinions with you. The fact of the matter is, with the exception of a very few close people, no one truly knows what you’re going through, what you’ve done or what you’re presently trying to do to find work. Unsolicited advice often come with the assumption that you’re just not trying, that you just don’t care and that you just aren’t capable. Rather than taking the time to ask and learn, invest in you to ensure their help is worthwhile, they just take their assumptions and start throwing opinions your direction. These opinions aren’t helpful and can often add a lot more stress to your days.

Being too good for some jobs is a fucking joke. I have a Bachelor’s Degree and ten year’s of industry experience… and I have had to ‘dumb-down’ my resume to even get retail places to take me seriously. I’ve been turned down from Wal-Mart, MacDonalds, Burger King, and so on and so forth, because they believe if they hire me, I’ll leave right away. Because of this I’m in an awkward stage in which career positions don’t seem to consider me a viable candidate and retail positions consider me not a worthy investment and thus, I can’t even get a job as a cashier. Life happens. Sometimes people have to deviate from the plan, you would think that potential employers would be understanding of that fact. But no. I dumbed down my resume, took my education and experience off of it, applied to be a cashier at a local grocery store. When I went to the interview I thought it was going great and the store manager loved me! Within two hours of leaving the interview I had a rejection email in my inbox. I can’t even pretend to be dumb to get a job it seems.

People assuming you want to be unemployed. If you’re unemployed for a certain length of time, people genuinely assume that you just don’t want a job.

Jumping through ridiculous hoops to try and find a job in 2019. Companies are asking for ten references, for you to record 15 minute videos of yourselves to submit for them to review with your resume, asking you to fill out application questionnaires that can often take upwards of an hour per application, to take aptitude after aptitude test that prove nothing more than an ability for deductive reasoning. NONE of what they are doing in this time involves having an actual conversation with you.


Read:

The worst things about unemployment >

More posts about unemployment >

49 thoughts on “The worst things about unemployment part two

  1. Hello my friend,
    Yes, I feel this too. Of course, I am sad that you (and others) are experiencing similar situations. At the same time, I am thankful there are some people who can genuinely empathize without being judgemental. In my country, becoming ‘older’ is also an added obstacle especially for women. (I think what makes it even more sad is how most folks conveniently “forget” what it feels like once they themselves find a job.)

    I understand it is not easy, and it can be extremely isolating at times. Continuing to send warm wishes your way. We will both find a good job ❤

    Like

    1. Thank You ❤

      I don't think people forget what it feels like, I think they just don't have to worry about it anymore so it doesn't register to them that people are still dealing. Which kind of sucks. Oh well, though. Right? All we can do is keep going.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s a good outlook.

      I’m not legally allowed to tell people what happened because I signed an NDA. So when people here I’m unemployed, they get to come to their own conclusions… even though it absolutely wasn’t my fault.

      And, right? You should be able to treat yourself without feeling guilty.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I hope things go your way soon.

    This is a great post, but its content is not a great feeling to be in.

    It’s not like you chose to be unemployed, and it’s not like you lack any useful skill. Sometimes life can be a pain up the rear.

    I hope you have a nice day.

    Like

  3. ah hun, it’s so frustrating when we find ourselves in this position, last time I was out of work, I’d sent of approx 700 applications, got 3 interviews from it. And I’m not lacking in experience. don’t lose hope, you’ll get something!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. No response from a potential employer whatsoever is the absolute worst. One of the first places I applied to after losing my job never responded to me, despite my skill set and experience basically being a perfect match for what they said they were looking for in the posting. The worst part is that now, two months later, I keep coming across that same posting because they keep reposting it :/

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I HATE IT WHEN THEY REPOST. They won’t tell you why they won’t consider you, they just keep reposting.

      For me, when I see that, I just keep sending them my resume. Eventually, either they’re going to stop posting, or they’re going to at least talk to me. That’s my outlook.

      Like

  5. I had a great job, but in 2015 I was laid off. I struggled to find work for over a year and lost my entire life’s savings trying to stay afloat. I ended up getting a job with a company that was losing $1 million per month and I felt I was destined for a similar ending, so I jumped ship to a small company and was making half as much as I was before. Then I had an opportunity to go back to the first company and I seized the chance. It wasn’t the same job, and I had a position that was further down the totem pole than I had before, but I took it anyways. After a year, I discovered my boss was behind the scenes actively working against me trying to promote myself within the company, so I found a job with a different company in the same industry. Then I was laid off five months after getting there. I was out of work for two months and took the first job offer I had. Now, I work in a career I never wanted and I have far less benefits and far less pay. As a result, I found a part time job to make ends meet and I am now working two jobs totaling 70-80 hours per week and making about $45,000/yr. less.

    I understand the struggle all to well.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Wow. While I may not have a place I call home, thankfully I’ve always had a roof over my head. I can’t imagine. You must be a really strong soul ❤

      Like

      1. Definitely chase after your dreams. It’s never too late to go back to school. There are 40 year olds in my program. Most of them are are degree holders, and the younger people are mostly transfers.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Unemployment truly is the worst. I get you with the low self-esteem and confidence, especially if one is already predisposition to anxiety. Feels as if you’re inadequate, despite years of credentials, experience, and hard work. Also really annoying that many companies who do interview you some times don’t even get back to you (even if they say they would), which is incredibly unprofessional. And even if your friends and family are concerned/sympathize with your unemployed status, the fact that they have jobs and their own lives make it hard for them to fully care (I get it– it’s nothing personal). Really stressful, and it can be difficult not to break down in tears every day. But using that sense of sadness and turning it into a sense of desperate determination makes a difference: mass applying to all sorts of jobs and managing to get one that, while probably entry-level, is a start. There’s still hope, and I hope you will continue to persevere in the job hunt!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. My husband is going through something similar. It is hard to find ANY job in this economy. I truly hope you find something soon that not only gives you money but also joy in your work. Good luck!

    Like

    1. I’m sorry for what your husband is dealing with. I’m sending virtual hugs and infinite positivity in his diredction and wishing him good luck to. Thank you for reading and for sharing ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  8. People become unemployed for all sorts of reasons and it can be really hard to get back into it. Nobody should judge anyone for that. And I totally agree about the job applications, it feels like you’re jumping through hoops just to be ignored. Hope you find something soon! Are there any agencies you could sign up to? That’s how I found my job at the moment, and it was only supposed to be 3 months but it’s turned into a permanent contract. 🙂 Even if it’s not what I want to do, it’s a start! Got my fingers crossed for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I signed up with two agencies that charged me a fee and ended up taking my information and ignoring me. It was a pretty stupid scam. Anyways, it turned me off from agencies. I’m not really sure what to do. I’m skilled, I just have no one that cares. Sorry for ranting. Reading your comment just made all those thoughts come out.

      That’s great about your position though – I bet it helps you save money for your travels!

      Like

      1. Begin to Weave and the thread will be provided. Hope all is well with you V
        My last day of travel. Love from Istanbul 🤗Canada was amazing

        Like

  9. understand, that I feel each and a single world in your post! I have never been in such a situation, but many of my friends had. And I have to agree with each and single statement! Sending to you my most positive thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I can say what happened. Minimum wage jobs don’t really have NDAs, but out of work for about half a year now. I just can’t go back to work yet – because I got fired for letting the company know I got injured on the job. I just volunteer while I get better. I’m not going to push myself if I’m not ready to go back – I have the money from that job to survive. It’s just difficult when some people say ‘you don’t work – get a job’ or say ‘you know, you need to work for free, get a mentor. It’s so easy to get a position, my kid moved halfway across the country to get it – so it’s possible’. Yeah, I’m not going to go back to work in these economic conditions. I’m spending less and holding out for better. Millennials spending less in the news – yeah, no joke. I wonder why.

    Like

  11. Hi,I hope you’re doing okay. In my case,I struggled to find a job that could give me further reference for my study. It was hard and when I found one,I thought this is it. Unfortunately, they subjected new employers to MCU and they found out certain disease that I had. After a few days of orientation,I was told to resign. It destroyed me, my self worth and confidence. I got several temporary jobs after that but I felt like living in survival mode,because I worked just to escape the pain from the previous rejection, it felt like I was trying to stay afloat. I was rejected for my condition,not because I’m competent. Also,it will greatly impact my future since I plan to enter residency.
    Right now,I got quite stable job which I took for the sake of stability

    I hope you’ll find what you really want.

    Like

  12. On talking with others – yeah that part sucks. I’m currently on disability leave from my job for who knows how long. I haven’t really told anyone yet in the family because “I’m paying tax money for that!” Which isn’t accurate. I’ve paid into these benefits for years.

    I hope something comes your way soon!

    Like

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