Letter to a thin-skinned soul

Dear Self,

As hard as you try, not everyone is going to like you. That’s a fact of life. And that’s totally okay. Don’t break your back over someone who’s opinion of you is never going to change. Quite frankly, their opinions don’t and shouldn’t matter to you. What should matter to you is who you choose to be, day in and day out.

Be yourself. Be authentic. Be true.

Those who know and love you will appreciate you for exactly who you are. Those who don’t, well, don’t waste your time or worry on them. You’re perfect just the way you are.

And if you do change, don’t change for anyone but yourself.

Sincerely, Me

35 thoughts on “Letter to a thin-skinned soul”

  3. True words spoken. Also know that you’re infinitely stronger than when you were a teenager: petty words and gossip don’t matter as much anymore. Caring less about what people think makes life go much smoother and you feel so much better knowing that. Developing thick skin is a process that I don’t think we can ever 100% reach, but getting close is well-worth it in the end.

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  4. Or, when somebody who falls into one of these categories that you tell yourself doesn’t matter hurts your feelings, makes you feel bad or just doesn’t like you, pause and figure out why it’s bothering you. What about them or their opinion makes you care? You may be able to disqualify them as an individual and not care what they think. I had to start doing this on an individual basis before it finally clicked in my mind that there were so many people whose opinions I truly didn’t care about, but the concept of not liking me is what wore me down. Start eliminating people one-by-one. Once you get in that habit, you start to pretty much not care what just about anybody thinks except those closest to you.

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    1. I think the people I struggle most with is those closest to me. Mom, Dad, Brothers, etc… That’s who I have the hardest time with. I’ve done a lot of what you said – a lot of cutting people out one by one, but sadly you can never really cut your family out. Some people try, but it doesn’t often last.

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      1. You can’t cut your family out, but just because you may not have won the DNA lottery means you have to truly care about what they think. Some of the dumbest people I’ve ever met are in my family. I love them, but they come from a place in their mind and hearts that I can’t inhabit. Love and respect are two different things and not everybody in your family deserves both.

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  9. Great words of wisdom which are easier to live by as I get older. I’ve decided that life is too short and can stop anytime, to worry about/please everyone. It’s only the people that I really care about that matter and I know that I can’t please them all but I can be the person that I truly am. I have to please myself though as that’s the person I am accountable for and I will have to justify my actions.

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    1. You sound like mom. She says it’ll come with age and that the older I get the more I’ll realize that I have to worry about my own thoughts and no one else’s.

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      1. Ha! Well, I’m a mom 3x over and soon to be a nana 3x over so “ you sound like mom” makes sense. It did come with age and experience for me as I once wore the badge of people-pleaser and finally realized one day, I’m out there battling for others but where are ALL the people battling for me? I’m not self-centered at all, by any-means but sometimes the road is lonely and the fight is fierce. You’ll find what’s right for you.

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  11. I know there are so many people that struggle with this. Thank you for writing this. And please post wherever you can. People need to see words like these more often.💜

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  12. Well said and it’s 100% accurate. You are you and you are perfect as you are. I think we should all be taking more self-care of our “you-niverses” as that’s where we all belong. It’s our own universe and we have to attempt to be the master of it. This is as much an affirmation for me as it is you, I’m struggling today. Massively. Seeing your posts always brings light to my day though.

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    1. I’m sorry you’re struggling. I’m going to go read that post you said you were writing when you emailed me earlier and then hopefully respond to your email, after I finish responding to all of my comments.

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      1. You’re a wee star responding to everything, V. I’ll be typing a response to your email shortly, once I’ve finished with the comments on my posts. Hope you managed through your weekend okay and sending you so much love and positivity.

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  13. I absolutely love this! I’ve been eliminating people over the last few years, mostly my family. Well, they stopped talking to me and stopped acknowledging me when out in public so I guess they were the ones doing the eliminating lol. A few friends have gone along the way. It’s hard but I’m feeling more at peace and I’m actually healing and making progress in my therapies (finally). However… My biggest hurdles that I have the most troubles with are my step dad and my sister. And I don’t think I’ll ever really want to be rid of them regardless of the lack of support. There’s so many that have this same struggle! Thank you for sharing!

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