The local pharmacist has said that we should each be documenting everything happening to us during this time. As I stood behind the plexi-glass screen watching him prepare my father’s prescription, I listened to him explain about how we’re living through what will one day be one of the most historical events of life as humans know it.
As much as the introvert in me does not like talking to strangers, I know he’s right.
The sheer physical, emotional, economical impacts this will have on this world will last decades. And, if I’m being totally honest, I don’t know how to deal with that yet.
The human race has seemingly become expendable. Those who get television time are the ones who are proclaiming that economies should open back up because senior citizens and those who are immunocompromised would gladly give up their lives for the sake of the American Dream. Companies left, right and centre are firing employees not because they have to, but because they’d rather ‘cut their losses’ and sail off into the sunset. And those that haven’t fired their employees are billionaires who are asking the general public for donations.
We’re living in a time when going to to the store to get some milk for your fridge could literally mean putting your life at risk. And there are adult brats on the internet licking toilet seats proclaiming that this is all a hilarious manifestation of government control. To anyone who’s taking part in the licking toilet seats challenge, that’s not going to age well, even if by some grace of the universe you don’t get sick.
I am hurting and I know I am not alone. Billions of people (yes I said billions) are going through this with me.
And it all started with one wet market in a country a half world away.
If nothing else, this year has officially validated the fact that we are all connected and that when something affects one of us, it affects all of us.
Nearly a million people have been diagnosed with a mystery illness across our world. Nearly 50,000 of those have passed away. And, with everything that is known, or isn’t known, at this stage, there are still (somehow) women and men standing out front of the grocery store trying to hand out pamphlets about how vaccines are the real issue… WHILE, NO LESS… wearing a mask on their face and asking people to not come too close.
Preachers are preaching that we brought this on ourselves and that god is using corona virus to punish us for our sins.
Health care workers, who on a normal day have some of the hardest jobs on earth, have now had to take on the task of convincing us all to take their word as the word whilst fighting a predatory, deadly illness that has been described as an invisible zombie apocalypse.
Years from now, when I look back on this, I want to remember this feeling. I want to remember the things that people said, the things that people did or didn’t do. Though they’re too small to know what’s happening right now, I want to be able to teach my nieces and nephews about this.
Canada is closed.
What used to be a cordial, friendly nation where people held open doors, helped you carry your things, shook your hand just because or gave you a hug if you looked like you needed it, we’re only going out if we need said milk from the store. The aforementioned men and women handing out anti-vaccination pamphlets were arrested for endangering the public, but promptly returned the next day after they were only given a citation and told to stay home. It’s an ugly wheel we’re spinning when the police are trying to protect the very people they’re arresting by not putting them in a holding cell. Court is postponed indefinitely so it’s not like there’s anything else they can do except standing in front of the store themselves, telling these people to leave.
A choir decided to go ahead with their practice, despite all of the warnings to not hold such events at this time. Now, 45 of the 60 choir members have tested positive for COVID-19 and 2 have actually passed away.
Seriously, go home and stay home. I say this because future me wants to remember the importance and significance of these simple instructions.
Where do we go from here? I don’t know. I do know that I’ve developed a fear of watching the news, going to the store and hearing someone cough or sneeze.
My debts are mounting, whilst people are bragging about spending $600 on video game systems… just because. Wow, it’d be nice to have $600 right now. But I’m sure that a lot of people would like to have an extra $600 right now, so as much as I’m inclined too, I’m trying really hard to not judge them for their choice of purchase. They had the money, I guess that’s that.
Finding a job right now is going to be next to impossible.
And yes, I know that I’m saying ‘I’ a lot with respect to something that is about everyone and not just me, it’s just hard. When tragedy strikes, the first thing you should do is ensure that yourself and your close family/friends are okay. Well, I’m not okay. I’m trying to be, but I’m freaking out.
There’s still a lot of snow on the ground here. At least a foot on lawns. Probably several feet in the bush. The roads, since they were plowed last week, have only a couple inches on them. Spring still seems as though it’ll be a long way away and I can honestly say that this has been the longest winter ever.
There are several aisles of the grocery store that are still empty. There is still no toilet paper. There is no pasta, very minimal canned goods, and no frozen foods. We also haven’t had eggs in this town for a very long time. I reckon in the supply chain we rank rather lowly compared to the larger city centres which is probably why. Regardless, I am hoping that one of these days there will be some sort of a restock.
I’ve been anxious, a lot. All the time, actually. It hasn’t shut off since my dad’s surgery. We learned that we lost my uncle so quickly after my dad’s surgery that things in this family really have not calmed down. As much as my parents and I absolutely do not get along, I do not wish for them to be in harms way, or sad, or any form of ill. He’s had a long and slow recovery. His follow up appointments were cancelled as they were deemed not a necessity. So he’s largely been wingin’ it. My mom did take him to the hospital one day to have him checked because he was coughing blood. It was an infection and the prescribed him antibiotics, with refills so that he wouldn’t have to come to back.
My parents… oh my parents. I know everyone reacts to stressful situations in different ways, but their reactions have been to… seemingly not care? I’m sure that in some way, deep down, they are in fact worried. They’re not showing it though.
All that being said, there’s still stuff going on that is scaring me so much that I can’t even bring myself to speak it. No, because if I speak it into fruition, I have to face it.
I’m scared. We’re all scared. There’s a definite sense of urgency in living right now. Everyone is carrying a weight on their shoulders and most are trying to hide it. I have noticed the very polarizing shift in the way society functions.
10 years from now, 20 years from now, 50 years from now… this year, this time in history will be one that’s marked in textbooks and research journals, historical records and televisions/movies across the world.
We’re living in history… right now. This moment hasn’t even passed and it’s already history. How’s that for a thought? Grab hold for dear life. I wonder if that’s how they felt during the World Wars or the Great Depression or the Plague. I wonder if they had time to feel, or if they just bared it and kept going, hoping luck would favour them enough to survive. My grandfather was born shortly after the first world war, and he would never talk to me about the second. The only thing he said was that he wished for a world in which we would never have to experience what he’d been through in his life. So I really don’t have any frame of reference from personal perspective… only what I’ve read in history books. Which, could very well be what people do with respect to this year, this pandemic, this… invisible apocalypse in several decades time.
My biggest hope in all of this is that people favour kindness. Be kind. Be thoughtful. Be mindful. It’s affecting everyone so I hope that very fact is remembered. Not that it’ll fix anything right now… but it might lessen the blow.
Oh and lastly, stay the fuck home.