Quarantine Day 8,781

Dear Patrice,

The local pharmacist has said that we should each be documenting everything happening to us during this time. As I stood behind the plexi-glass screen watching him prepare my father’s prescription, I listened to him explain about how we’re living through what will one day be one of the most historical events of life as humans know it.

As much as the introvert in me does not like talking to strangers, I know he’s right.

The sheer physical, emotional, economical impacts this will have on this world will last decades. And, if I’m being totally honest, I don’t know how to deal with that yet.

The human race has seemingly become expendable. Those who get television time are the ones who are proclaiming that economies should open back up because senior citizens and those who are immunocompromised would gladly give up their lives for the sake of the American Dream. Companies left, right and centre are firing employees not because they have to, but because they’d rather ‘cut their losses’ and sail off into the sunset. And those that haven’t fired their employees are billionaires who are asking the general public for donations.

We’re living in a time when going to to the store to get some milk for your fridge could literally mean putting your life at risk. And there are adult brats on the internet licking toilet seats proclaiming that this is all a hilarious manifestation of government control. To anyone who’s taking part in the licking toilet seats challenge, that’s not going to age well, even if by some grace of the universe you don’t get sick.

I am hurting and I know I am not alone. Billions of people (yes I said billions) are going through this with me.

And it all started with one wet market in a country a half world away.

If nothing else, this year has officially validated the fact that we are all connected and that when something affects one of us, it affects all of us.

Nearly a million people have been diagnosed with a mystery illness across our world. Nearly 50,000 of those have passed away. And, with everything that is known, or isn’t known, at this stage, there are still (somehow) women and men standing out front of the grocery store trying to hand out pamphlets about how vaccines are the real issue… WHILE, NO LESS… wearing a mask on their face and asking people to not come too close.

Preachers are preaching that we brought this on ourselves and that god is using corona virus to punish us for our sins.

Health care workers, who on a normal day have some of the hardest jobs on earth, have now had to take on the task of convincing us all to take their word as the word whilst fighting a predatory, deadly illness that has been described as an invisible zombie apocalypse.

Years from now, when I look back on this, I want to remember this feeling. I want to remember the things that people said, the things that people did or didn’t do. Though they’re too small to know what’s happening right now, I want to be able to teach my nieces and nephews about this.

Canada is closed.

What used to be a cordial, friendly nation where people held open doors, helped you carry your things, shook your hand just because or gave you a hug if you looked like you needed it, we’re only going out if we need said milk from the store. The aforementioned men and women handing out anti-vaccination pamphlets were arrested for endangering the public, but promptly returned the next day after they were only given a citation and told to stay home. It’s an ugly wheel we’re spinning when the police are trying to protect the very people they’re arresting by not putting them in a holding cell. Court is postponed indefinitely so it’s not like there’s anything else they can do except standing in front of the store themselves, telling these people to leave.

A choir decided to go ahead with their practice, despite all of the warnings to not hold such events at this time. Now, 45 of the 60 choir members have tested positive for COVID-19 and 2 have actually passed away.

Stay home.

Seriously, go home and stay home. I say this because future me wants to remember the importance and significance of these simple instructions.

Where do we go from here? I don’t know. I do know that I’ve developed a fear of watching the news, going to the store and hearing someone cough or sneeze.

My debts are mounting, whilst people are bragging about spending $600 on video game systems… just because. Wow, it’d be nice to have $600 right now. But I’m sure that a lot of people would like to have an extra $600 right now, so as much as I’m inclined too, I’m trying really hard to not judge them for their choice of purchase. They had the money, I guess that’s that.

Finding a job right now is going to be next to impossible.

And yes, I know that I’m saying ‘I’ a lot with respect to something that is about everyone and not just me, it’s just hard. When tragedy strikes, the first thing you should do is ensure that yourself and your close family/friends are okay. Well, I’m not okay. I’m trying to be, but I’m freaking out.

There’s still a lot of snow on the ground here. At least a foot on lawns. Probably several feet in the bush. The roads, since they were plowed last week, have only a couple inches on them. Spring still seems as though it’ll be a long way away and I can honestly say that this has been the longest winter ever.

There are several aisles of the grocery store that are still empty. There is still no toilet paper. There is no pasta, very minimal canned goods, and no frozen foods. We also haven’t had eggs in this town for a very long time. I reckon in the supply chain we rank rather lowly compared to the larger city centres which is probably why. Regardless, I am hoping that one of these days there will be some sort of a restock.

I’ve been anxious, a lot. All the time, actually. It hasn’t shut off since my dad’s surgery. We learned that we lost my uncle so quickly after my dad’s surgery that things in this family really have not calmed down. As much as my parents and I absolutely do not get along, I do not wish for them to be in harms way, or sad, or any form of ill. He’s had a long and slow recovery. His follow up appointments were cancelled as they were deemed not a necessity. So he’s largely been wingin’ it. My mom did take him to the hospital one day to have him checked because he was coughing blood. It was an infection and the prescribed him antibiotics, with refills so that he wouldn’t have to come to back.

My parents… oh my parents. I know everyone reacts to stressful situations in different ways, but their reactions have been to… seemingly not care? I’m sure that in some way, deep down, they are in fact worried. They’re not showing it though.

All that being said, there’s still stuff going on that is scaring me so much that I can’t even bring myself to speak it. No, because if I speak it into fruition, I have to face it.

I’m scared. We’re all scared. There’s a definite sense of urgency in living right now. Everyone is carrying a weight on their shoulders and most are trying to hide it. I have noticed the very polarizing shift in the way society functions.

10 years from now, 20 years from now, 50 years from now… this year, this time in history will be one that’s marked in textbooks and research journals, historical records and televisions/movies across the world.

We’re living in history… right now. This moment hasn’t even passed and it’s already history. How’s that for a thought? Grab hold for dear life. I wonder if that’s how they felt during the World Wars or the Great Depression or the Plague. I wonder if they had time to feel, or if they just bared it and kept going, hoping luck would favour them enough to survive. My grandfather was born shortly after the first world war, and he would never talk to me about the second. The only thing he said was that he wished for a world in which we would never have to experience what he’d been through in his life. So I really don’t have any frame of reference from personal perspective… only what I’ve read in history books. Which, could very well be what people do with respect to this year, this pandemic, this… invisible apocalypse in several decades time.

My biggest hope in all of this is that people favour kindness. Be kind. Be thoughtful. Be mindful. It’s affecting everyone so I hope that very fact is remembered. Not that it’ll fix anything right now… but it might lessen the blow.

Oh and lastly, stay the fuck home.


29 thoughts on “Quarantine Day 8,781

  1. People just need to adhere to the Stay At Home in place by the smarter states down here. We’re not being asked to go to war and pick up a weapon, we’re being asked to sit on the couch and watch TV. Or for those like me who don’t have any conventional TV: write, paint, decorate, sculpt, whittle, whatever.
    This is not that damn difficult.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Absolutely. It’s time to stay home. It’s time to do nothing. It’s time to let the world pass by so that we can stay healthy. Write. Paint. Decorate. Do something that’s good for your mental health while you’re at home.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. We’re in a different kind of war, it’s totally unknown what’s going to happen and we’re all in it.
    I got a call from my friend last night in the middle of the night, she was NOT doing well. After I talked her down, I told her maybe she should go to the emergency room or call a hotline.
    This is the 2nd call I got from a friend who wasn’t doing well at all.
    I try not to piggy back on blogs, but I did write some things today from my own life experiences dealing with crisis: https://helleren.blog/2020/04/01/day-16-handling-a-crisis-tips/
    The pharmacist is right, this is historical and I’ve been writing daily to pass on to my future grandkids. Hang in there everyone!!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Yes, in years to come, many of us will have lived through this crisis (I hope) and be part of history. We should be taking photos everywhere we go (while we’re out exercising), particularly places in London and other massive cities where on an average day we literally bump into people hundreds of people and stand nose to nose with strangers on the rush hour underground.
    And now, the streets are bare, the trains and buses are empty and I haven’t seen anyone other than hubby the last two weeks.
    I live opposite where they’re building the UK’s largest hospital and I need to get some photos. Perhaps I’ll get out tomorrow well, today — I’ve just seen the time — it’s almost 6 a.m. and I still haven’t slept 😦 No wonder I can’t think and I’m not making any sense in this comment – lol. Caz x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Right? That’s such a good idea. I am not in a large city, but I’ve seen some pretty eerie photos. I bet seeing London with empty streets would be very eerie. If you do take pictures just make sure you stay safe and healthy and away from others, please!!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. When the history of this thing gets to be written – not the scientific side, but the sociological stuff – blogs will be important source material, the first hand accounts of ordinary people trying to cope with something that is – in the true sense of the word – extraordinary. Your blog and mine, and a million others, will be small pieces in the jigsaw that will maybe enable future generations to make sense of it all. We are part of something big, game-changing. Without doubt, in my view, the world will never be quite the same again. But what will the “new normal” be like, will we – as a species – have learned and improved ourselves from the experience? I hope so, but I have my doubts. Stay safe, Vee.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’ll be interesting to see what comes out of this, what the world does to act and react to a pandemic. Hopefully it’s something to learn from – because things like these are worth avoiding a second time around.
      Stay healthy, my friend.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. During WW2 the States were kept informed by the “Fireside Chats” from FDR (Franklin D. Roosevelt.
    In England Princess Elizabeth (now Queen) drove ambulance. The King & Queen use to go and talk to people in the streets of England.
    I cannot speak to what happened in Canada, I feel that there was someone helping Canadians finding solace during the war.
    The world right now could use several of these type of men & women during this pandemic.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for sharing.

    I’m a social introvert. I need a balance between time out doing stuff with people and time alone. And I’m having a hard time mostly because my life has gone from one extreme to the other without giving me time to prepare emotionally. I had a very rough 2019 and early 2020, and everything I was looking forward to over the next few months so that life could finally get back to being fun and normal is gone. You say to do something good for my mental health while I’m here, but being in this condition is inherently bad for my mental health, so there’s only so much I can do.

    I know a lot of people have it worse off than me, though, and I hate to sound like I’m doing nothing but complaining. It’s just hard…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hey, don’t feel bad for complaining at all. We’re all going through a tough time right now and it’s true, there will always be someone in a worse off situation. But what’s also true is that their struggle does not delegitimatize your own. Delegitimize? Those aren’t words. What I was trying to say was that I feel you. I understand.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I think perhaps a lot of people had begun to see “us” (humans) on a different level to the rest of the world – able to control it – use it – abuse it – as we see fit. Hopefully this year will serve as a reminder that we’re not as important as we like to think.

    Liked by 1 person

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