8:30 AM

How much did I sleep last night? Maybe an hour… tops.

I just can’t calm down. I’m not sure what’s going on. That’s a lie. I know what’s going on there’s just nothing that I can do to fix it right now. Sometimes shit hits the fan and you just have to wait for the storm to pass.

I’ve been working for two hours already and I’m exhausted. I feel like a zombie. There is not enough coffee in this world to get me through this week.

It’s going to be another long day. If I make it through this week I’m going to hibernate for the summer.

35 thoughts on “8:30 AM”

  1. Also – when I went through the starvation eating disorder thing, that was basically just a big ol’ manifestation of panic. I figured that out afterward. I read this book “Hope and Help for your Nerves” by Claire Weekes and it helped me a lot. It’s a fun historical read as well, seeing as it was written in the 1950’s. But much anxiety research and treatment that came after is based on that one very good book. https://www.amazon.com/Hope-Help-Your-Nerves-Anxiety-ebook/dp/B009PFN4IQ#:~:text=Claire%20Weekes%20offers%20the%20results,conquer%20your%20fears%20for%20good.
    I really hope I don’t get categorized as a spammer or robot by the system for plugging all these links….

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      1. Robin, you messages are still being flagged as spam. I am going into my spam folder now because I emailed WordPress and they told me that you weren’t flagged as spam. I’ve whitelisted you and your comments still go there. So I’m unsure of how to fix that one other than fishing comments out of spam each day. There’s still a lot of people’s comments going there, actually. It’s a tad annoying.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. How hilarious that my comment about spam did itself go into spam 🀣. Was just asking for it. This one DEFINITELY won’t go into spam πŸ˜‰. I bet they have a word search for the word ‘spam’ in comments as part of their dodgy broken-assed algorithm!

        Thanks for your efforts! Glad it’s not just me. It’s happening to me on other blogs, though. So I feel like the length or frequency of my comments could be related to it πŸ€·β€β™‚οΈ but then they’re obvs not spam. Hard to see why WordPress have an automatic system for flagging spam in the first place, as opposed to just letting you manually block each new source of it. They’re doing something overly-complicated.

        Liked by 2 people

      3. I’ve noticed that people who leave me quite a few comments at once are getting flagged. Like if someone’s reading my blog and they post on four or five posts simultaneously, I think they’re getting flagged as spam. I’m getting a lot of drug-related comments on EVERY SINGLE post, all coming from the same accounts. So I think wordpress might be filtering anyone who makes a comment on more than one post, or shares more than one link.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I haven’t been sleeping great either. Not as bad as you, though. I blame the world. People. Other stuff. Can’t think of anything I might say to make you feel better. If you want to talk, let me know, yeah? Might help.

    Otherwise, hugs. I know you don’t like them, but that’s immaterial. So, hugs. And maybe have some hot chocolate.

    Liked by 2 people

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    1. Hugs are gross.
      And yes, that’s the grouchy asshole in me saying that. Even before a Corona Virus world, I’m not sure how human beings think that wrapping your sweaty arms around someone is comforting.

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  6. Have you been taking your sleep supplement at night? I guess sleep supplements do not overpower insomnia mixed with anxious thoughts…

    Next time anxiety hits, pick a cartoon that requires no brain power (The Simpsons, Family Guy, Spongebob etc.) and watch it before bed. I know the experts say not to watch TV before bed, but as long as it’s mind numbing (and funny!) it should be enough to get your brain from racing at a million miles and raise your mood; this is why it needs to be funny. It’s counter-intuitive but I highly recommend trying this if nothing else is working.

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  9. I just saw your other posts. I have some links that may help you – from the last time I had extended panic. The first one helped a full-on panic attack where I couldn’t breathe and everything: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07j2hshKShs
    Here’s another one, so that you can get to sleep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HieUiZBZyOo I know you said it doesn’t work, but it may in full on panic.
    This emergency one is also good: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sz-cNBAK7Qs

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. Finally getting a chance to go through these links. Thank you for sending them to me. I definitely need some more zen in my life and definitely never go to YouTube when I need it.

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  10. Oh my dear, these posts are reminding me of when Ty was first born with colic, reflux and 0 sleep. It’s something I have washed out of my memory because it was a painful time. Yikes sis😣

    Liked by 1 person

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      1. Oh no I’m sorry you’re going through this V!!! I can unfortunately relate and that pain is do real. I pray you’ve found some relief by nowπŸ™

        Like

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