Just because there are some things that I am unhappy about does not mean there isn’t good in my life. Just because there are some things that I am insecure about does not mean that I don’t like myself. Just because I have doubts does not mean that I don’t have certainties. Just because I’m an idiot when it comes to some things doesn’t mean that I’m an idiot when it comes to all things.
It’s okay to not have all of the answers. It’s okay if you don’t have a clear path. I don’t care what people say about trying not being good enough. Trying beats the hell out of being stagnant in life.
It’s okay to make mistakes. It’s okay to screw up. What’s not okay is refusing to learn lessons from those times in life that seem so damn bad, you don’t ever know how you’re going to recover. Acknowledging your missteps and learning from them is literally the first step towards recovering, carving a new path and ensuring you don’t fuck up the same way twice.
Often times we treat these situations in life as though they’re rules. Rules we cannot break. We cannot possibly be insecure, unsure, uneasy or unhappy because if we’re any of these things it means we’re not secure, sure, easy-going or happy. That’s simply not the case. The world isn’t black and white. There are so many shades of grey and being able to understand that will bring a lot of peace, I promise you.
Don’t let people tell you how to feel, your feelings are warranted. Don’t let people tell you who to be or what to believe. You are who you are for a reason. That doesn’t mean that who you are is who you always have to be. Human beings are a work in progress and it’s well within you to change, if you want to. If you don’t, though… be proud of who you are. Flaws and all. Uncertainties and all. Insecurities and all. Uneasiness and all. No one else in this world is you.
Brilliant post, as always. How true that people see a small part of us and mistakenly try to put us in a box. Big hugs for you, V.
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Labelling people only stifles them from who they have the potential to be.
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I hear you. β€οΈ
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You’re amazing β€
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“Just because Iβm an idiot when it comes to some things doesnβt mean that Iβm an idiot when it comes to all things.”
Oh man I have done/thought some stupid things in life, despite things I am also proud of! Things in personal life, school, work, which rocked me with their impulsivity/stupidity. Almost accidentally killed myself several times, injured myself. So I find it hard to accept when someone calls me intelligent, lol. But that’s good, good to stay humble. Genius lies in never thinking that you’re a genius π. All you have to do is walk into a library. I’ve also been described as the whole range from stupid to intelligent, by different people including teachers and professors. Or pretty much any personality trait from one extreme to the other. But most of the time, I was simply a misfit (which is great in my opinion!). So yeah, only you know you!
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Being an intelligent impulsive person is the worst of both worldsβ you have to put up with all the stupidity in the world, whilst occasionally being monumentally stupid yourself π.
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You raise the point that everything in this life is subjective. Someone might think you’re smart, someone else might think you’re dumb. What really matters is what you think of yourself. Everyone else is just talk of people who don’t know better.
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Well, I think there are some objective elements to it. But there’s no standard definition of intelligence, so we each have our own definitions. And then the measurement/perception of intelligence within any given definition of it, is also subjective.
One of the most objective definitions of intelligence you could have, would be to tie it into natural selectionβ given the environment which exists, which type of brain is most successful? Well at the moment, that might be the most narcissistic/capitalistic personality! But most people would rank ‘moral intelligence’ as quite a large part of overall ‘intelligence’. Then that’s a whole other can of worms lol.
I don’t think most people are that specific about what they mean by ‘intelligence’ to begin with, so yeah, the whole thing is fraught with nonsense!
In the end, as you said, all you can do is have your own feeling about your own intelligence and others (or no feeling at all), but trying to communicate that is nonsensical in most situations!
Most people would agree that trump is an idiot, so that at least indicates some common objective aspect that we’re judging! And anyways, it’s best to just assume (within your definition) that you’re an idiot and strive to be more intelligent π.
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Even though it’s hard to accept yourself, but when accepting really works wonders π€
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Accepting yourself can bring so much peace in life. I agree, it works wonders for your well being.
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Well said.
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Thank You
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Hear hear.
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Sending you hugs
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Everyone makes mistakes. We’re human. It’s how we learn, hopefully. It’s OK to offer advice, when it’s solicited, but it’s not OK to think you can or should try to change someone. If you can’t accept the way a person it, you need to move away from them. We are all different and the sooner we learn to celebrate the differences, the better off we’ll be.
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You’re so right. And I think all too often people just assume they can change someone with their words. No… that’s not how it works. If someone wants advice, they’ll take it. If not, it just needs to be left at bay. Your words sum up my post in a much more concise, eloquent manner. Thank you for that.
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Damn skippy V!!!! One of my biggest pet peeves is being told how to ferl. That’s manipulative and controlling behavior! Also gas lighting. Ugh, if people could just see that ALL of the feelings and thoughts come and go while we get to cjoose which ones to follow and which ones to ignore. Much of the time it’s just ego screaming at us because of a change we’ve made and our minds want to keep us safe, playing small. It’s breaking out and away from these thought patterns where salvation lies. You are much stronger than you think you are, nobody gives you enough credit. Acceptance of oneself for all of the qualities, light and shadow is when true freedom is discovered. You are good enough. You are wise. You carry on despite it all, a mark of a true warriorβ€ππ
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Breaking away from those thought patterns is absolutely integral to leading a fulfilling life. The rules we have are those which we set for ourselves. And, if we change our minds and just choose to live freely, we’ll probably be a lot more satisfied with who we are and what we’re capable of!
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Exactly π―!! This is where I am now, on the other side of it all with my π up to all of the old non serving patterns that held me down and back. Have you listened to the interview I did for my friend’s podcast, “The Art of Aliveness”? My episode is called “Turning your Sensitivities into Superpowers” and the basis for what I call my midlife Renaissance ππβ€π
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“Trying beats the hell out of being stagnant.” I kinda want that on a T-shirt or something. Solid post. I’m with you.
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That particular line is from an episode of Grey’s anatomy from like ten years ago, so I definitely cannot take credit. But also, since that line is from Grey’s anatomy, there’s probably already shirts for it. lol
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Haha, good to know.
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Awesome post. Your words are inspirational. Trying means you are in the fight and eventually you will win. Nobody can do it like you.
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Abso-freaking-lutely.
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This was a great post! Very refreshing for me especially since Iβm trying to really put myself out there and live a satisfying and fulfilling life.
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You can do it! Do what makes you happy and fulfilled and let the nay-sayers stay in the past. β€
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I especially resonated with your last part about the world being grey, instead of black and white. I tell my peers that it’s not healthy to have a fatalistic perspective on life, especially with the not-so-great current events happening this year. It’s important to acknowledge that there’s no right answer to anything, and that it’s okay to feel helpless and uncertain about situations. But what’s also important is that you eventually take the steps to get out of the state of uncertainty, to find any sense of happiness in this world. It’s about bettering yourself, even if things aren’t perfect. Hope you’re doing okay on this World Mental Health Day!
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