Things that make me anxious.

When I went to get my mail today (community mailboxes down the street) I noticed a collection of cigarette butts on the ground, a step down from my front porch.

Did one of my neighbours just decide to empty their ash tray directly in front of my house? Or was someone lurking outside of my house for an extended period of time last night?

Yeah, I’m probably going to worry about this when I go to sleep tonight.

I live alone. I don’t need anyone hanging out at my front door for extended periods of time.

British Columbia is burning.

This is my home.

3:00 PM Near Whiterock Lake Fire from @Kelowna_Doris on Twitter
10:00 PM Near Mount Law Wildfire from @CUrqhartGlobal on Twitter
This is the Coquihalla Fire on Highway 5 from @TransBC on Twitter.

There are fires burning out of control across the province. More than 50,000 people have been forced from their homes in evacuations. Highways are shut down. Smoke has filled the air from British Columbia through Saskatchewan. There’s over 200 fires burning in the province. It presently looks like it’s 10 pm here, though I’m writing this at 2:30 in the afternoon.

I need ideas for birthday presents

My mother’s birthday is coming up.

If you have any suggestions for birthday presents for mom’s, I’d love to hear them.

My mom is a very casual person. She’s a jeans and a t-shirt type of lady. So like… nothing that’s fancy, because she’s too casual for that.

Thank you.

Edited after the fact because people pointed out how petty I was being and I heard them. Removed the pettiness. Thank you for being honest with me.

Things I want to write about.

I’m writing this here, to hold myself accountable. I will make posts on the following subjects. If I don’t, kick my butt in gear. Remind me. Don’t let it go. (Not that anyone has that much investment in my opinions, lolololol I sound ridiculous)

  • Pretty privilege
  • Sad-fishing
  • People confusing cancel culture and accountability
  • Side effects of anxiety that people who don’t have anxiety often don’t realize
  • The dangers of influencers recommending after-pay to their audience
  • How every aspect of your digital footprint affects yours, and your company’s brand
  • Paying people what they’re worth and not downplaying the value they provide
  • The toxicity of ‘Girl Bosses’ and ‘Mom Bosses’
  • Things you should know before buying a car
  • Things you should know before buying a house
  • Why your blog doesn’t get the views you want it to get
  • Instagram is changing, will you need to change with it?
  • The sides of marketing that everyone seems to believe just magically happen
  • The importance of doing your own research for investing in stocks (to include crypto scams currently plaguing the web)
  • What is the VPC of your blog?

I have so many thoughts and ideas I want to share on this blog. I need more hours in the day.

Also, if you have thoughts on any of these subjects, please write a post and share it on your blog and tell me to come and read it. I like reading other’s opinions and seeing where people agree with me and where they don’t.

People that annoy me

People who say ‘we should do coffee’. No, no we shouldn’t. There’s a reason why we haven’t seen each other in years. If I wanted to go for coffee with you, I would have at any point in the past [x] amount of time in which we haven’t communicated.

Parents who exploit their children on the internet for cash. I’m not talking the mom’s or dad’s who post pictures of their kids just because. I’m talking about the parents who post pictures or videos of their children and go into very detailed descriptions of their physical or mental health issues or tell their child’s personal stories for things like Mr. Clean Advertisements (because yes, this does happen on Instagram all of the time).

People who are unwilling to do their job. If you’re being paid to do a job, please do said job. If you don’t like it, if you don’t want to be there, if you think you’re too good for the job, whatever the reason might be… you don’t need to make everyone else’s lives difficult because it

Guys that don’t call you when they say they’re going to. Don’t say you’re going to call if you’re not going to call. No woman, myself included, wants to be sitting around waiting for a man to call.

People who make everything about them. When you’re telling a story or reading or a story or simply minding your own damn business and that person always has to speak up about something that happened to them, or someone they knew, or something they did… yeah those people.

Drivers that hold up all the traffic in a parking lot so that they can wait 20 minutes for a spot close to the door. Heaven forbid they’re forced to park two rows away and walk an extra 200 feet to get into the store.

People who take all but the last two sips worth of the coffee, or the orange juice, or the milk, so they don’t have to replace it. If you drink the end of the coffee, make another pot. If you drink the end of the juice, get more juice.

People don’t care abut something until it happens to them. It shouldn’t have to happen to you for it to matter to you. Period.

Nosy neighbours that need to mind their own business. Nuf Said.

Litterers.

People that pretend to care. At least when people don’t fucking care and are honest about it, they have the guts to be honest about it. Someone pretending to care is such a waste. A waste of effort, a waste of thought, a waste of emotion. Just a waste.

Extreme weather in Calgary

So this ended the heat wave in Calgary. This isn’t my picture. It’s from Twitter. I can’t see who originally posted it, and it seems like 50 or so have posted it now, so I don’t have credits. Basically, Calgary went from the hottest temperatures ever recorded in Calgary’s history to flash flooding. This rain/hail mixture fell very fast, leaving several streets underwater in various parts of the city.

In other parts of the city there were massive hailstones that broke windows and damaged roofs/siding of houses and plenty of cars. Someone named Brandon shared this photo of the hail from the South end of the city. That’s a Canadian Quarter (25cents) in his hand

Posted by @HouckisPokisewx on Twitter

Here’s another example of why these hail stones were able to do so much damage. Not my photo.

@yycwx_inam




There’s been some wild weather in Western Canada the past week or so.

Lytton burns to the ground

Photo credit: The Canadian Press/Darryl Dyck

Just days after earning the record of having the highest temperature ever recorded in Canadian history, the tiny town of Lytton in the BC Interior has been burned up in a forest fire.

It’s estimated that the fire has burned up 90% of the town. The fire took over the town in what seemed like a matter of hours, but to the people in town, it probably felt like minutes. There’s some pretty amazing footage of people driving out of town. It was a grab the pets, grab the photos and get the hell out kind of scenario. Example:

There are people missing, though it has not been released how many (that could largely be because people could have evacuated to different places and it will take time to locate them). Let’s hope that as many people as possible made it out safely. Sadly, there have already been some lives declared as lost to the fire. Please keep them in your thoughts – those who lost pieces of their families and their lives and their homes. May everyone who’s currently unaccounted for be safe, somewhere in the province.


I grew up in British Columbia and have spent most of my life there. Forest fire season is no joke on a a regular year. I cannot imagine how dry those forests are after this recent heat wave. Forest fire season this year could be worse then ever before. Let’s hope it doesn’t get that way.

I actually have some photos of Lytton on this blog from two years back. It was a very cute little town. The kind of place where everyone knows everyone and it costs 50 cents for a rootbeer float. It was a special little town.

Financial Trauma

Recently, one of my favourite YouTube commentator channels, Tiffany Ferg, did a video about the role that wealth and class play in one’s ability to succeed with social media as a career choice. Video here, for reference:

One of the things that Tiffany spoke of in this video is the way that money, or lack thereof, can play a significant role in who we are, and who we become.

So, let’s talk about financial trauma.

The concept of financial trauma is the idea that those from low-class economic status have larger portions of their personality shaped around money than those raised in the middle class or upper class. Essentially, growing up poor or barely scraping by, play a considerable role in who you become.

From a personal perspective, this is absolutely true.

From a societal standpoint, I do believe this to largely be true. It’s one of the reasons, I think, why lottery winners are infinitely more likely to file for bankruptcy than regular folk. The sudden windfall of money is something that they really don’t know how to deal with, especially if lands in the laps of someone who’s spent their whole life scraping by, or just making it pay cheque to pay cheque.

But, let’s backtrack here.

I grew up in what is regularly defined as one of the most expensive cities in the world to live in. I was one of five biological children and seven total children living in the house. As a family, we were very much house poor. This means that we were living in a house, we had a roof over our heads and were ultimately very privileged in that sense, but the sacrifices made to ensure that roof stayed over our heads meant a lot of sacrifices in other areas of life.

My siblings and I would regularly go out on bicycles after dark to collect cans and bottles from dumpsters, to earn what very little money we could so that my father would have a way to and from work each day. There were actually days in which he hitchhiked to work. (Due to my father’s profession and the location of our house relative to where he worked, it was very difficult for him to find a coworker who was headed there at the same time as him)

Those memories, they stay with you. They define you, dare I say.

Even so, I know that while I may have grown up low-class in an upper-middle and upper class world, I still acknowledge how blessed I was to be in the situation that I was. Sharing a bedroom with three other people was annoying at times, but I did have a room. I had a house. I had a place to come home to. It’s something that I know a lot of people in the city which I grew up, and the world, did not and still do not have. For the sake of this share, I just wanted to acknowledge the privilege that I did/do have.

One thing I distinctly remember from my childhood is that, for the years in which we did have a vehicle (largely my teenaged years), the gas tank was always riding ‘Empty’. My parents had scraped together enough to get the vehicle, but between the vehicle and the house payments, things felt tighter than ever before.

I think this is very much one of the reasons why I didn’t purchase my own vehicle until I was 31 years old. I think this is one of the reasons why you will never, ever, ever see the gas-tank in my car get below the half-way mark. I can’t do it. The anxiety and stress that I get from seeing the gas-tank read closer to ‘E’ than it does to ‘F'(Full) is something that I cannot tolerate. If I cannot afford to fill up my car with gas, to keep it above the half-way mark on the tank, then I won’t drive my car until I can.

This, to me, is the idea of financial trauma. That the socioeconomic status in which you’re raised is something that stays with you, for what I can only assume is your whole life.

I know I’m not alone in this.

I know someone who grew up in a world-renowned mountain town, one famous for skiing/snowboarding, winter lifestyle and affluence. Their parents brought them to this country as refugees and they landed in this mountain town by some sort of cosmic coincidence.

Their upbringing was hard. This mountain town, known for accepting wealthy tourists from all over the world year-round, was one where cost of living was high, while the possible wages able to be earned by a refugee couple and their children was.

They’ve told me stories about working as a bag-boy and shelf-stocker in the grocery store every day of the week from as early in life as they were able to work, with the money they made in week not even being able to afford them the groceries they would want to buy from that very store. And of following their mom and dd to work as janitors at night to help them get work done faster so they can get more done, and thus make a little more money for the family.

This person, a lot of the financial decisions that they make today are the outcome of what they went through growing up. They go out of their way to ensure that living pay cheque to pay cheque will never again be their reality. They also go out of their way to ensure they don’t/won’t work in any industry remotely related to the jobs they worked growing up. The way in which they grew up has played a big role in defining the decisions they make today.

To an extent, I think this idea of financial trauma will be present in anyone who has lived, or is presently living in a situation in which money is not something that allows them to be comfortable. And, when you really stop to think about it, it’s something that really doesn’t affect those who come from a higher-level socioeconomic class. Because they’ve never had to worry about money, they’ll likely continue to not worry about money, or the choices they make with their money. Not unless they suddenly fall into bankruptcy.

So what shapes them, then? What shapes the upper half? If they’re not plagued by the choice of which bill to decide to pay this month, how do they discern how to make difficult decisions in life? I’m not too sure, really. I can speculate. But, since I’ve never experienced being in that place in which I don’t have to worry about money, it wouldn’t really be fair for me to do as such.

Also, I just want to point out that this is not my shaming of people who come from, or presently reside in, upper-half socioeconomic classes. Money is a wonderful thing. And, if you’re able to reach a point in life in which you’re comfortable, which you have a cushion in your bank account, I think that’s a very good thing.

I wouldn’t say that I have a cushion, where I’m presently at in life. But, I did manage to pay off my debts earlier this year, so I reckon I’m probably in better financial standing that many people my age. That feeling of having no debts, that feeling is unlike anything I’ve ever achieved before.

Funnily enough, my parents, in their late 60’s, have officially paid off all of their debts this year as well. While I’ve noticed a certain ‘lightness’ to them that I’ve never experienced before in my life, I also notice that there are certain things they’re unwilling to do. There are certain decisions being made out of the preservation of their present status in life, to ensure they never go back to their state of financial trauma.

I’d also like to note that financial trauma affects everyone differently. For some people, I think financial trauma manifests itself in hyper-consumerism. People desire to have things to showcase their status. For other people, financial trauma can manifest itself in an unwillingness to buy anything.

As much as money can’t buy happiness, it doesn’t play a very large contributing factor in who we grow up to be. Whether we went through financial trauma in the past, or we’re presently going through it now, money affects every decision in our lives, to some extent.

I’m not really sure how to close this, so I’ll just leave with an ideological thought that’s been on my mind for years. Internships should be abolished. The concept that young people should be forced to work for free and that University, College or High School credit, or ‘experience’ should be enough of a reason to force them through financial hardships should end. Free labor/labour should not exist in the western world. It shouldn’t exist in the world at all, actually. But that’s a discussion for another day – something I need to do a lot more research on and learn a lot more about. The concept of forcing a young person to work for free, ‘to pay their dues’ whilst they’re still required to pay their bills, their rent and they still need to eat is wholly unfair. At the very least, interns should be paid minimum wage in the industry for which they work.

At what point in time do we stop wishing for younger generations to ‘pay their dues’ (a grossly misguided belief) and start saying ‘perhaps the favour I can do for future generations is to ensure they don’t have to go through that which I did’.

Fin.