Alexa, tell me I’m pretty.

One of the things I purchased with the winnings from my recent work awards was an Amazon Echo Dot. I’ve always wanted to try one, but I just never really got around to it. Now that I didn’t even have to spend my own money on it, it seemed like the perfect time. I also have a somewhat smart house already. (Can control lights, thermostat, etc… with my phone)

Oh Alexa.

She’s nosey.

She’s smart, but she’s nosey.

This is possibly because I haven’t quite figured out how to use her yet. I was watching the Corona Virus Press Conference this afternoon (to learn more about the continuous nightmare unfolding in this city) and they were taking questions from reporters. One of the reporters acknowledged herself as ‘Alexa [Insert Last Name]’ before asking her question. The Echo Dot heard the question and said ‘I’m not sure’.

Apparently I didn’t properly set up the voice activation cues.

Anyways, I’ll be getting on that tonight.

Does anyone else have one of the Amazon Alexa devices? What do you use it for? What can I use mine for that I haven’t discovered yet?

More changes?

When I put my mind to something, I will accomplish it. I really don’t care if there are odds stacked against me. I really don’t give a damn what anyone thinks in the matter. If I know that I can do something, that something is going to get done.

I’ve begun looking for a new job.

Why? My job is great. The company that I work for is really great. They’ve been a saving grace through this pandemic. Sure, there are a few idiots here and there, but for the most part, the work is really enjoyable. On Thursday, though, they let me know there won’t be any room for growth within the company… at all. Not now. Not ever.

This was disappointing to hear. When I accepted the position, I knew I was doing so in the middle of a pandemic. But, I was promised there were room for growth. I was promised there was room to move up, to eventually seek management. To expand on the position. To take it where I could take it. They essentially shut the door to any of that.

I appreciate their honesty. The could’ve hid their plans from me and lied about it. Long term though, this isn’t somewhere I’m going to stay. With no room for growth, this isn’t somewhere that I should stay. It’ll work for now. It’s been a real blessing to have a pay cheque given everything that’s going on in the world. But I have no sense of company loyalty.

I’m not quitting, at least not until I find a new job. I’m looking for a new job now, though. I’m testing the waters, I guess you could say. There are plenty of other places in this city that I could take my skills. I’m sure one of them could realize what I bring to the table and give me the room to grow.

I don’t know. Am I crazy? Am I stupid for wanting more? Should I just be appreciative that I have a job given the state of the world? Don’t get me wrong, I am appreciative that I have this job given everything that’s going on in the world. I just hate the idea of settling… especially since it’s not an assumption, I was given full notice there’s no room for growth.

There’s a company out there that needs me, that is willing to offer opportunity for growth. I just have to find them. For the time being, I’ll be good to the company that I’m with… you know, so they give me a good reference and all.

I won an award

Today my boss was notified that marketing materials I created for my company were chosen for an award. The large organization operating in the United States chose my marketing materials as the best submission of more than 600 entries.

I’m extremely proud.

I am brand new to the industry that I work in presently. I started in May and prior to starting, I’d never had any involvement with anything relating to any company, organization or subject matter surrounding the industry which I presently work. This is a big deal for me. This is also the second award that my work has won in two months.

To me, this is an acknowledgement that marketing is absolutely integral to the way business is done. If you have better marketing, you’re going to have more success with your operations. Heck, if you have better marketing, your company is going to be acknowledged on an international scale when awards are distributed.

While I know that we work as a team and we win as team, we all play different roles within the organization. This win is a direct reflection of the role that I’ve taken on over the past few months and the improvements I have made for their company. I know I said it before but I’m really proud.

Back in the interview process for this job, they asked me ‘Why should we hire you over other qualified candidates?’ The response that I gave them was something along the lines of ‘They may be qualified but they’re not as qualified as I am’ and that they wouldn’t ever regret making a decision to hire me. My boss brought up those comments today when I was informed of the win.

Pretty cool.

The Discord Dummy catches COVID

One of the reasons that I was very anxious about how sick I was this past week was because one of my coworkers recently let us know that he tested positive for COVID.

Firstly, I wasn’t surprised when he told us. I’ve written about him on this blog before, here and here. Basically, he’s been exceptionally careless about the ongoing pandemic. He’s been going on dates and hooking up with females like it’s nobody’s business, and, detailing his exploits on the company discord. The fact that he has COVID was a little bit of karma finally catching up with him.

“Practice safe sex” really takes on a whole new meaning when there’s a deadly pandemic sweeping the globe. I can’t imagine the frustration of the health care workers trying to do contact tracing and having to follow ‘Girl I had sex with from Tinder’ as a lead.

While I haven’t been physically present within six feet of him, we were in the same office together for several days. We walked the same halls, opened the same doors, you know… we shared the same vicinity. So, the fact that I was really sick had me extremely worried that it was COVID and that I had caught it from him.’

Anyways, apparently he’s felt like absolute shit. He went so far as to say this is the sickest he’s ever been in his entire life. Do we think he’s going to learn anything from this experience? Doubtful.

The good news is, I didn’t have COVID. I had the flu. I’m feeling much better now, which I am grateful for. I think I was feeling extra whiney when I was sick because I had the added anxiety of waiting for test results. Thankfully I was able to avoid people for several days so I know for certain that no one else got sick because of me.

Grocery delivery is quickly becoming one of my favourite conveniences.

As for Axel, haven’t heard from him in a couple of days. Hopefully he’s recovering well. Even if he did have this coming, I still hope he’s not suffering too badly.

Back when we first started hearing about this virus in late January on the news, one of the first things my brother said about it was “You really can’t vouch for the healthiness of anyone but yourself”. Which is so, so, so true. If anyone who reads this is dating during this pandemic, just be careful. You really can’t vouch for the health of the other person… even if they say they’re perfectly healthy. It’s better to be safe than sorry.

Overheard on Discord

Employee 1: Anyone with cats – how do you stop them from meowing for attention? My cat is driving me nuts lately

Employee 2: Give them away.

Employee 3: Give them unending attention. Problem solved. You’re welcome.

Employee 4: If you feed them well, take care of their litter, and shower them with affection, they’ll die in 15 – 20 years. Just wait it out, buddy.

Employee 5: We found that getting a dog and having babies both bothered and entertained the cat. You could test that out?

Employee 4: Yeah, I agree. You should get Employee 5’s dog and kids.

Employee 5: You want to borrow my dog and kids for a few days, weeks, months or years to test the theory?

Employee 6: My cat is perfectly happy sitting next to me all day. All I had to do was get him his own laptop so he could feel as though he was a part of the team.

Employee 7: Yeah, there’s a reason why you guys always see my cat’s ass on video chat. Needy shit-head won’t leave me alone. Wait it out, buddy. You should be good in 15-20 years like Employee 4 said.

This conversation actually went on for a solid two hours this morning. The conclusion saw my coworker giving his cat their own laptop. He said the cat got quiet when it had its own keyboard to lay across. Maybe it just felt like it was missing out?

Can’t say that I’ve ever had a cat as a pet before, but I was laughing pretty hard reading this conversation. You definitely have to be a patient soul to own a cat. hahaha!

Hey, it’s Tuesday

Have I made it back to the doctor yet? No.

But, I’m not beating myself up for that fact. I will get there. In the mean time I have taken steps to help minimize my stressors/triggers. I spoke with my boss and am working-from-home for the remainder of the week. Thankfully, I am blessed to be working a company that both allows, and makes it possible, for employees to work from home.

Being around people was making me anxious. My boss was very understanding. When I really stopped to think about it, 100% of my productivity working from home beats 50% of my productivity working from the office because I cannot function because I am so anxious about everyone around.

It’s not a permanent solution. But, for now, I’m taking things day-by-day.

I also took the advice of multiple people who sent me notes both here and on Instagram and I tried meditation last night. While I cannot say that it did anything for me last night, it was my first time ever trying meditation on my own, so I am going to give it more attempts.

I also have not watched the news in two days. I am hoping that helps me not get so stressed about the events of the world. While I do believe it’s important to be informed, it just feels as though the constant influx of ‘holy shitballs’ stories night after night has definitely been getting to me.

Tonight I’m working on another site. I’m also trying to build a store that’s not really a store (it needs to look, appear and feel like an online store without actually using a platform such as shopify as I don’t need the payment platform). I’m considering making some new #MillennialLifeCrisis shirts for my birthday, and I probably should eat dinner and sleep somewhere in there.

What’s everyone else up to these days? I’d love to hear some good news, if there is any out there to be heard. If you’re Canadian, how are you safely taking part in the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday?

Celebrating alone tonight

I accomplished a monumental feat at work this week. So monumental that, in the entire existence of the company, it’s never been accomplished. I’m really damn proud of that fact. Sure, we’re all a team and we all work together and we win collectively as a team. But this one, the company won directly because of what I did. That makes me feel good. That makes me feel damn good.

I really wish I could go out and share a drink with some friends right now. But, since that’s not possible, or smart (given the sharp increase of COVID cases in this city the past few weeks), I’m hanging out here wondering what I should do. Order myself some dinner? Order myself some wine? Order myself a congratulatory present? I don’t know. How does one celebrate when they’re alone at home? I’m clearly bad at this.

Tuesday’s surprise

Five people from my work were fired today.

Five people. No explanation as to why, just notification that they no longer work for the company.

Five people got fired and I wasn’t one of them. I know it’s just my being overly sensitive but I really feel for each of those five people. Whatever the reason they were fired, I know what it’s like. It’s never good to be abruptly out of a job… let alone during a pandemic.

Usually you hear about last hired, first fired… but I was the last person hired. I’m still here, still standing and feeling like I dodged a bullet in some way.

Overheard on discord: The CEO dropping wisdom

Today’s a real zinger. A short, simple and relevant quote left by the CEO.

“If you don’t make time for your wellness you will be forced to make time for your illness.”

Let that sink in.


From time to time I have been sharing stories of things seen on my company discord.

If you missed the first posts, you should check them out!

Story time: The office frat-boy

Story time: Overheard on Discord

Second job hunting

I’m looking for a second job. I need something to keep me busy. The way I figure it, if I can make myself busier, I’ll have less time to think. If I have less time to think, I’ll have less time to be anxious. At least that’s the train of though I’m presently following.

Plus it would mean extra money. Extra money is always a good thing, right?

Christmas is coming.

I need some new glasses.

I need some new work shoes.

Extra money could come in handy for all of those things.

The problem with finding a second job is trying to find one that has minimal interaction. There’s all kinds of jobs available around here that involve a lot of interacting with the public. While I greatly admire everyone who’s been working those jobs for the past seven months through this pandemic, I just don’t think I can be one of them. I need to keep my interactions with people minimal right now, for my own peace of mind. If the point of working a second job is to keep myself from being anxious, I don’t want to put myself in a position to make myself more anxious.

Right now I’m thinking a delivery driver would be a good job for me. That or finding someone who is willing to pay me to work from my couch. I know, I know, I know… a girl can dream, though. Perhaps if I hope for it long enough, I can dream it into fruition.