Things that annoy me.

The fact that you cannot get an actual human being on the phone when you call a business in this day and age. Firstly, answering machines that say “Click 1 for —” and “Click 2 for —” are not helpful. They are not more productive than an actual human being answering the phone and they are not an adequate replacement for a human being answering the phone. Secondly, waiting on hold for 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 30+ minutes to speak with an actual human being is ridiculous. It’s annoying that this is considered acceptable customer service in 2019. “Then don’t phone them!” I’ve heard some say. Well, if I had the option of not phoning them, I probably wouldn’t be here waiting on hold for 30 minutes…

When someone phones you, doesn’t leave a voicemail and then immediately sends you a text message that says ‘call me’. You couldn’t leave me a voicemail? You couldn’t text me the message you want to talk about? If I didn’t answer the phone it’s because I’m clearly not able too. If you need me for something, leave me a message as to what it is.

Youtube ‘Influencers’ that don’t acknowledge they’re clearly being sponsored for their videos/posts. Regulations and law surrounding sponsorships/partnerships were put into place in the United States, Canada and the United Kingdom and many other countries for a reason – that reason being these ‘Influencers’ have a great deal of sway on how the people who watch their videos spend their money. So it drives me batty when I see someone who makes youtube videos clearly pushing something they’re being paid to push and not telling their audience that. There are a lot of naive people in this world and I don’t want them being taken advantage of because this youtuber is too important to follow the law. If you’re being paid to push it, you should be transparent about that.

When companies send the same generic “Thanks but we’ve selected someone with more qualifications than you” email to everyone. If a candidate jumps through all of the hoops of applying for a position with you, respect that. This often isn’t a quick process. This is filling out every form, answering all of your stupid ‘what would you bring to an office game night’ questions, providing references, taking part in pre-interview tasks, doing phone interviews, Skype interviews, and so on and so forth. It can often take 30 minutes for one single application. It’s annoying as heck that the best a company can give in return is a generic, computer generated email to let you know they haven’t given you the time of day and don’t intend to.

Mosquitoes. Seriously, it’s summer in Canada and these suckers are everywhere. And when I say suckers, I mean suckers. A bug that sucks your blood? How twisted is that. Then you’re left with this annoying bug bite that itches for weeks to follow. Or, if you’re lucky enough that you can swat and kill it you’re left wondering what poor sucker’s blood is now smeared all over your hand. Yeah, it’s that gross.

Washing dishes by hand. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, life is far too short to wash dishes by hand. That’s quite literally what they invented dishwashers for. If it can’t be washed in the dishwasher, it’s not a dish that I want to own.

When the traffic light turns yellow and 6-7 cars continue to speed through the intersection. Seriously, when did we become a world in which the biggest inconvenience in our day is having to wait an extra three minutes for the traffic light to change in our favour again?

Dear Autocorrect, I NEVER mean ‘Ducking’. Never. Never, never ever.

This list is mainly supposed to be satirical, but also with a hint of serious nature to it. I could go on and on with these things, but I’ll keep it to this, for now. I love hearing about things that annoy people and I love finding common annoyances with people.