A couple of months back I shared this post: Getting pregnant to ‘trap a man’ is THE WORST IDEA ever.
To sum up the entirety of the story quickly, my cousin is manipulative and decided that she was never going to get another boyfriend as attractive as her current boyfriend so, by her logic, she might as well find a reason that would make him have to stay. So, her plan was to get pregnant.
I did manage to get in touch with her boyfriend to try and let him know about her plan but, by the time I’d done so, she’d manipulated him into believing that I was a liar and that he shouldn’t listen to anything I had to say, the conversation was brief.
Well, she’s pregnant.
Her mom(my aunt) phoned my mom the other day to share the news of how excited she was to have her first grand child on the way. My aunt said that no one is allowed to know because she’s only five weeks along. So… my cousin told me her plan was to get pregnant in late November. It’s now February 4 and she’s five weeks along. If you do the math… it took her very little time to execute on ‘Operation Trap My Boyfriend’.
When my mom told me that my cousin was pregnant the discussion came up about what my cousin told me in November, how this was her plan. My mom’s response? ‘No, that’s definitely not true. She has PCOS, she was told it would be difficult to impossible to conceive naturally’.
Yeah, she doesn’t have PCOS.
‘Where did you hear that she has PCOS?’ I asked my mom.
‘[Your aunt],’ my mom said.
So, my cousin convinced her mom that she had PCOS and was going to have a hard time having kids if she ever wanted them. Her mom then then in turn convinced my mom that she had PCOS. Who wants to bet that she convinced her boyfriend that she had PCOS so they didn’t have to worry about getting pregnant?
*Note – It is worth noting, I am aware that PCOS makes it difficult to get pregnant, not impossible. I am also aware that there are women in this world who use PCOS as an excuse when they don’t have it. Nevertheless, I digress.
Apparently, the boyfriend is happy. Apparently he’s, and I quote from my mom, from her mom, from her, ‘he’s over the fricken moon’ with excitement.
Also, apparently, the boyfriend is from a religious family. And, religion being something that baffles me to my core, his family is completely okay with him living with his girlfriend out of wedlock, but, his family is not okay with them bringing a child into this world out of wedlock.
According to my aun they might get married to appease the family, and then have a ‘real wedding’ after the baby comes.
Of course all this is hearsay at this point because I have since been… ex-communicated from her life for trying to tell her boyfriend of the plan. So, the information I am being provided I am taking with a grain of salt.
Breaking this down for my own brain: Cousin plans to trap boyfriend by getting pregnant. Cousin tells me this plan in November. Aunt delivers news that cousin is pregnant in February. Cousin’s boyfriend comes from a family that believes you cannot bring a child into this world out of wedlock. So… cousin and boyfriend could potentially be getting married in a ‘quickie ceremony’ to appease religious family.
I wonder how cousin’s boyfriend(and his family) feel about divorce?
I also wonder how cousin’s boyfriend will feel when they inevitably have a fight that leads to him learning she intentionally got pregnant. Because this will come out. Things like this always have a way of coming out.
I stand by what I said in November… getting pregnant to trap a man is the worst idea ever. Even if they do get married, even if they do try to stay together for this child, this entire situation is going to put some serious strain on their relationship. And imagine how this poor child is going to feel when their fights happen. I feel like ‘plans like this’ always come up in fights over the years. I feel like this child is destined for a life of tug-of-war parenting.
Her boyfriend is a cop. I don’t know him well, but I reckon in being a cop (and now from learning he comes from a religious family background) the concepts of honesty and integrity are important to him.
I wonder how he’s going to feel when he learns how manipulative his girlfriend is.
Also, this poor child that’s going to be born into this.