Aspirations and dreams and whatnot…

Lately I’ve been really thinking that now’s a good time to start a business. I’m blessed enough to have this job that I love, that pays me well, and you know… maybe I ought to use some of that money towards starting a project that belongs to me, a business that I make the rules for, that I have control over, and that can supplement my income.

I’m not used to this feeling. I’m still getting accustomed to the idea that my dreams are attainable. That the possibilities just might be endless. I’m still having a hard time believing I deserve the good things in my life and that, dare I say, I could achieve even more.

I realize that I’m extremely blessed to be in the situation that I am in now, and I’m very thankful for where I find myself. Last year me never saw things turning out this well. Hell, this year me didn’t see things turning out this well. Things aren’t perfect but I know that I am very blessed. Blessed and grateful. I wish I could go back and tell my sad, depressed, anxious past self that it was all going to be okay. And, now that things are okay, I want to do more. I want to start a business. A side-hustle. A je ne sais quoi, so to speak.And, now that I don’t have to sell my personal belongings in order to pay for necessities to survive, I want to take advantage of the present. After all, they say there’s no time like the present. And if not now then when?

What does this business look like? I don’t quite know yet. I’ve got some skills. I’m not totally useless. I somewhat don’t suck at marketing for when I do get said business off the ground. And I happen to have a business partner who specializes in sales of everything that is difficult and seems impossible.

Maybe this year could mark the birth of something great? Or maybe I won’t get around to starting anything? I certainly hope it’s not the latter. Presently seeking clarity where it presents itself, because there’s no time like the present.

Do dreams mean anything?

For a few weeks now I’ve been dreaming, every night, that someone is trying to murder me. Whomever it is, they are never identified in any of my dreams, I just catch glimpses of the back of a head as they run, bike or drive away from the scene of the attempted murder…

Every dream I somehow manage to escape a tragic fate. I would suggest almost as though I’ve got nine lives but there’s definitely been more than nine dreams at this point.

Do I just watch too many cop shows? Are my dreams telling me I should open my eyes in case someone around me is trying to harm me? I’m really just speaking out loud here but it has been so bizarre. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just not handling stress well and this is my body telling me…

Operation Positivity

Kootenay National Park, British Columbia, Canada

I did this a few weeks back and it really helped with my outlook. This week, I’m making it my goal to be positive. I’m going to think positively, see the glass as half full and try to see the good moments, no matter how small I might think they are.

Today I am grateful that I’m not going to work for a boss who treats people so poorly and I’m hopeful for the future. I’m hopeful that things will change, turnaround, pick up for the better.

Today I am going to make the conscious effort to smile. And I look forward to one day not having to make the effort because smiling will just come naturally. Because being happy will be a reality, not a desire. Because things will have worked out for me. Because I didn’t give up hope when it mattered most.

It’s Monday… let’s do this world.