I FINALLY GOT PAID.

Please excuse the caps. I’m just THAT excited.

In follow up to ‘The Downsides to Consulting‘, I finally got paid. It didn’t come in time for Black Friday, which was a huge bummer. I wanted to use the money to buy some Christmas presents for some people in my life for cheaper than they would inevitably be this week, but nevertheless, I still got paid!

Ironically (not ironically, more like coincidentally) the money came today because of the fact that they have another project request for me today.

‘Okay, I’ll pay you now because I need something from you again.’

It can, at times, be a very vicious circle.

If you’re freelancing/consulting, please don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. If you do the work, you deserve to get paid. Don’t let people delay payment, give excuses, prolong things.

Like mentioned in the comments of my last post about this subject, a person would never leave a hair salon without paying for the services they just had done, whether it cut, dyed or styled. So, a person should not take over a month to pay an invoice for the work you complete for them for a project.

Stand your ground.

Your value is mighty. You got this.

Starting in January

I’ve thought a lot about it and one of the things that I would like to do, starting in January, is a series (or maybe a one off depending on who wants to participate or not) about careers. What is your career? How’d you land in your current role? What drew you to the industry? What is your education? What are the requirements to do what you do?

If anyone would like to take part, and be my first guinea pig for the series please email me at millenniallifecrisis12@gmail.com.

Whether you have a relatively common job, such as a teacher or a nurse, or a relatively uncommon job, such as a Biochemical Engineer or the Travel Agent for the British Royals, or anything in between, I’d love to hear about it.

FYI: The series (or one off) won’t give away any specifics, like the name of your employer, I just want to do a series on careers and what people do to achieve them.

Update: I’ve gotten a lot of responses since posting this! More than I ever thought I’d get. It might take me a couple of days to get back to you. But there are some pretty cool people with some pretty cool jobs that I look forward to sharing more about in January!

I’ve you’ve sent me an email, I will send you one back, I promise! It might just take me a day or two!

Hey Universe, if you're listening.

I have a phone interview tomorrow, for a really awesome position with a really awesome company, that starts in January. Universe, I don’t know if you’re listening or not, but if you are, how about you work some of your magic? I’ve seen you do it before and I could use some of it right about now.

It’d be awfully nice to have a new job to go to in 2020. Awfully nice indeed. Dare I go so far as to say it would make me have a very merry and happy Christmas? Because I really think this position could change things for me. I really think it could make me a better me, a new me, a happier me.

Is that selfish of me to ask for your help? I think that’s selfish of me to ask. I don’t care though. A girl’s gotta get her turn eventually, and this, this could be mine!

Universe, I would like this job. Not one three months from now, or six months from now, I want this one.

I would be so happy if they could like me enough to give me an in-person interview. I know once they met me they wouldn’t want to pass me up. I just need them to give me the in-person.

Goodness, I hope this goes well tomorrow.

Sincerely, A hopeful soul.

Letter to a thin-skinned soul

Dear Self,

As hard as you try, not everyone is going to like you. That’s a fact of life. And that’s totally okay. Don’t break your back over someone who’s opinion of you is never going to change. Quite frankly, their opinions don’t and shouldn’t matter to you. What should matter to you is who you choose to be, day in and day out.

Be yourself. Be authentic. Be true.

Those who know and love you will appreciate you for exactly who you are. Those who don’t, well, don’t waste your time or worry on them. You’re perfect just the way you are.

And if you do change, don’t change for anyone but yourself.

Sincerely, Me

Questions for you!

I’ve been interested to find out more about the people that read this blog. If you’re reading, and can answer, please do. I’d love some more insights (the analytics nerd in me just really loves this stuff)

  1. How old are you?
  2. What generation are you a part of?

For reference (for the second question):

  • The Silent Generation: Born 1928-1945 (73-90 years old)
  • Baby Boomers: Born 1946-1964 (54-72 years old)
  • Generation X: Born 1965-1980 (38-53 years old)
  • Millennials: Born 1981-1996 (22-37 years old)
  • Generation Z (Post-Millennials): Born 1997-Present (0-21 years old)

Oh mother

Today my mother told me that I’m way too focused on being sad all the time and if I put half as much effort into being happy, I would just be happy.

‘How do I do that?’ I asked her.

‘I don’t know. You just be happy. It’s easy.’ She said.

I try not to fault her too much because she really doesn’t understand mental health issues whatsoever. She’s never dealt with them so she doesn’t know that they’re very real and very difficult to overcome. And, if you’ve never dealt with them before, I can understand why it would be hard to grasp the complexities of it.

The thing is, though, it’s not as simple as she makes it out to be.

I can’t just think happy thoughts and become happy.

I can’t just be happy.

I’m not trying to be miserable. I’m not trying to be sad. I’m not trying to feel anxious. I’m not going out of my way to make any of this my reality. And I think when people stereotype it as a choice, that’s what makes it harder for people to talk about their mental health.

I want to laugh because something’s funny, not because I feel a social obligation too based on the people that I am around. I want to smile without having to think about it, without having to force it, because of the people that I am around. I want to just ‘be happy’ as she says.

But, if I don’t face these issues that I have, these internal struggles that plague my mind, I fear that they’ll plague me for the rest of my life. If I just grin and pretend they’re not there, they’re never going to go away. They’ll be there… probably forever.

Mental illness is a difficult subject for people to talk about. If someone breaks their leg, people can see it. They can see the physical injury and understand that person must be in pain because of said injury and they provide well wishes, support and hope to said person with broken leg that will invariably help them with their recovery. But, you can’t see an anxious mind. You can’t see a depressed soul. You can’t see a distraught heart. And if you’ve never felt something that you can’t see, this is, I think, where people struggle with helping those who suffer from mental illness.

You’d never tell someone to ‘just walk it off’ if they had a broken leg. So why are so many people so quick to say ‘Just be happy’ to someone who struggles with anxiety, or depression or bi-polar, or any of the other mental illnesses. Because they can’t see it, so they don’t understand it.

Talking helps. Sometimes it really can. If you feel safe and are able to open up to someone, sometimes talking can really benefit your situation. There are people who, though they’ve never been through it, do all that they can to try to understand.

But then there are people who won’t ever understand. Because this is the kind of thing that, unless you go through it yourself, is difficult to grasp.

To everyone in this world suffering in silence, I’m with you. I understand. To everyone being told to ‘just walk it off’ or ‘just be happy’, I know that life doesn’t work that way. Please, take the proper time and resources that you need to find yourself healing. Because, just like a broken leg, you need time to cope and to heal.

I’m wishing you peace, and for family/friends that understand. But, even if they don’t, I’m wishing you time to cope, to deal and to heal. Because everyone needs that – whether your hurt is physical (and visible) or not.

Blogging 106: Writer's block? Here are some simple subjects to write blog posts about.

With the exception of a very select few, every writer/blogger has been there before – when you want to write but you don’t know what to write. It’s one of the most frustrating feelings you can go through, writer’s block. And when you’re there, you’ll give anything to get out of your rut. How do you? You write. Write about anything. Write about everything. Write about the things that you may think are stupid and do all that you can to ensure those words hit the page. Write everything down. Even if it’s never going to leave your drafts folder, put those words on the page.

Here are some subjects that you can write about, things that you can share your opinions on, things that people enjoy reading about;

Write about how you wound up in the career you’re in now. Whether you have a common job – such as a nurse or a teach, or an uncommon job – such as a cardiothoracic surgeon, someone somewhere in this world is wondering what it takes to become a professional in your field. Sharing the story of how you got there could help a lot of up-and-coming professionals.

Write about the most incredible trip you’ve ever taken. Whether you’re a world traveller, or a one-and-done type of person, travel is a subject with one of the broadest audiences on earth. Even if someone is not going to the location you’re speaking of, they still will want to, and enjoy, reading about tales from your adventures.

Write about your hometown. Where are the best places to eat? Where are the best places visit? What are the funnest activities to do while there? Whether you live in the largest city on earth or a small town in the middle of nowhere, people will travel through your hometown each year. Why not give them a guide of things to do and places to see while there? Categorize it as ‘Travel’, because, while yo might not be travelling there, those that are travelling there will be the ones reading it.

Write about mental health, self-care, recovery and coping. This is one of the most broadly discussed topics on WordPress. If you have experience with mental health issues, either with yourself or a loved one, share your perspectives. Not only does it lessen the stigma, but it helps other’s feel less alone in their present situations. This might sound like a sad statement to say, but it’s nice to have a community, or friends, who understand what you’re going through.

Share your talents. Can you play the piano? Can you play the guitar? Can you kick a field goal as easy some people get up in the morning? Share that with the world. And, if it’s a talent you have that is teachable… something that others can learn, share. Pass on that wisdom. Millions upon millions of people take to the internet to learn new skills… even things as simple as the different ways to tie a tie. From second languages to second natures, if you’ve got the skills and wisdom to do it and patience to teach it, use your blog as a platform to teach it.

Talk about celebrities. People love to read other’s perspectives of celebrities. It’s quite literally why the Kardashian’s are famous. Share your opinions on celebrities. If someone agrees with you, they’re going to love your take and if someone disagrees with you, they’re likely going to want to talk about it. And, since this is the perfect opportunity, use your blog as a platform to remind people that two people can disagree with one another and still treat each other with respect.

Talk about true crime and mysteries. Does true crime fascinate you?Whether people admit to it or not, true crime fascinates a lot of the world. People disappearing, seemingly off the face of the earth fascinates people. There’s a natural wonder and curiosity within many people that wants to know what goes through someone’s mind when they commit murder. There are Youtube Channels of people just giving their take on different murders from around the world and these channels have hundreds of thousands of subscribers. On Sept 30 a woman in Anchorage, Alaska found an SD card on the ground that was labeled ‘Homicide at Midtown Marriott’. The SD card was filled with photos and videos of a man named Brian Smith sexually assaulting, murdering and then disposing of a woman’s body. I read a blog post a few weeks back about this story in which the author merely shared their opinion of what they think on the subject matter and the post had 3,200 likes on it. The post had more likes than the blog had subscribers. Why? People love crime.

Write about another blogger. Someone that you appreciate, or admire. Someone’s content you read on the regular. Spread the love. That blogger is going to appreciate the shout-out, and your community could possibly find themselves another blogger to love as well!

Make lists! People love lists because they’re short, easy to read and to the point. What are the ten best things about being female? What are the ten best things about being a male? What are your favourite songs of all times? What are your top travel destinations for 2020 and why? Make a list. They’re quick to read, allow you to share your opinions and are posts that people frequently like to comment on.

Whatever you’re writing about, write with your heart, passion and soul behind it. Authenticity is important in blogging. People will see if you’re passionate about what you’re sharing or if you’re just blogging to get attention. They can judge your character, even if they’re a stranger. So always make sure that you’re blogging about things that you love.

Write it.

Write it all down. Put it in your drafts folder. Some of it might be stupid, sure. Hell, I’ve got a lot of stupid posts in my drafts folder. I can promise you that after it’s written, you might realize that some of it’s pretty freaking awesome.